Strategic Organizational Communication Emphasis
I recently had the opportunity to complete a project for the BYU-Idaho Admissions office. The office sends thousands of letters each year to prospective and admitted students. Some of these letters haven’t been updated for over 10 years, are not tailored to their audience, and are hard to understand. These letters are the first form of communication a student receives from the university and significantly impact their perception of BYU-Idaho. Updating the letters and making sure they are tailored to their audience and easy to understand is vital to the success of the office.
Having worked in the Admissions office for three years, I’ve noticed that the communication system is filled with letters that are irrelevant, outdated, or just collecting dust. The clutter makes the system hard to navigate, causing employees to waste time finding the correct letter to send students. My frustration with this system led me to choose updating the letters as my senior project. My supervisor supported this choice, emphasizing the confusion and outdated information in the old letters. This project was a chance to apply my communication skills in a meaningful way, and I eagerly embraced it.
Getting Started
To begin the project, I needed to identify which letters were essential and which ones required immediate revision. I collected data from our IT department, learning the frequency of letters sent using the communication system over the past 13 years. After organizing and collecting more data, including when letters were last updated and how they were organized, and consulting with full-time admissions counselors, I determined that eight letters needed immediate revision. The BYU-Idaho Admissions office sends over 36,000 letters each year, averaging more than 100 letters a day.
Given that these letters are the first form of communication prospective and admitted students receive from the university, they need to be professional but not overly formal. After analyzing the data, I thoroughly read through each letter and made revisions. Part of this process involved understanding the intended audience for each letter. I shifted my perspective from someone experienced in admissions processes to a student’s viewpoint by talking to other students. For example, I asked my roommates, including a first-semester freshman, a sophomore, and a few seniors, to review one of the first letters I revised, the student deferment letter. Without revealing which was the original and which was the revision, they all preferred the revised version. Although this was a small sample, it included BYU-Idaho students who would receive this letter if they requested a student deferment. As the admissions office replaces the original letters with the revised ones, I am eager to see the larger-scale impact. Meticulously analyzing every sentence and word in these letters, I confidently applied and further developed my communication principles and skills. Throughout this project, I learned several valuable lessons.
Words Matter
Words are more than just tools for communication. When used strategically, they can be powerful instruments for understanding and action. The BYU-Idaho Admissions office sends over 36,000 letters each year, many of which had not been updated for over a decade. These outdated letters were not tailored to their audience and were often difficult to understand. The communication system was overcrowded with irrelevant and outdated letters, preventing the office from reaching its potential efficiency. I identified and revised each letter, focusing on clear, concise, and relevant language to ensure that each letter conveyed the intended message effectively. Here is an example of a specific phrase that I reworked multiple times until I found the right words:
Original: Your admission has been deferred until Winter 2025. You continue to be admitted on the Fall/Winter track.
Revision: We will be expecting you back for the Winter 2025 semester, on the Fall/Winter track.
Final Revision: We will be anticipating your return for the Winter 2025 semester, and you will continue on the Fall/Winter Track.
This example illustrates how word choice can significantly change the tone of a message. While revising each letter, I purposefully selected words and phrases that accurately communicated the message.
Times Change
Communication constantly evolves, and it’s crucial to adapt to avoid being left behind. To effectively communicate with prospective and current students, the letters needed to eliminate outdated terminology and use language that is easily understood. During the revision process, it became clear that many original letters contained dated phrases and inaccurate information. For instance, the student deferment letter, which is sent to over 4,000 students each year, hadn’t been updated in years. It was filled with outdated and confusing information. To better understand the specific questions students had, I spoke to the student admissions counselors who answer phone calls and emails. One frequently asked question was about getting an override for the flex track, a process that has changed frequently over the past three years.
Example:
Original: Congratulations on your missionary service! As a result of your missionary deferment, you have been readmitted to Brigham Young University-Idaho. You have been accepted for the Fall/Winter Track beginning Winter 2024. Classes for this semester begin Monday, January 8, 2024. We look forward to having you on campus and feel you will be an asset to the University.
Revised: Congrats on completing your missionary service! We’re excited to let you know that you’ve been readmitted to Brigham Young University-Idaho. You’ll be starting on the Fall/Winter Track in Winter 2024, with classes kicking off on Monday, January 8, 2024. We’re looking forward to having you on campus and believe you’ll be a great addition to the university.
Applying the communication principles and techniques I’ve learned; I revised the letters to reflect modern language and removed outdated information.
Know Your Audience
Tailoring each letter to its respective audience is crucial. The original letters often failed to do this, as reflected in their tone, style, and word choice. For example, a letter informing international students about taking an English proficiency exam should be tailored differently from a letter for concurrent enrollment students still in high school. Understanding the audience allowed me to make more effective adjustments while revising each letter.
Drawing from my personal experience and conversations with students and full-time counselors, I sought to understand the needs of each audience. The admissions office benefits from a diverse group of student employees from various countries. I spoke with these students to gain unique perspectives and listened to their feedback after they read the letters. Understanding the needs, preferences, and concerns of prospective students allowed me to craft letters that resonated with them, increasing their engagement and response.
Through updating the letters, I learned the value of clarity, the necessity of evolving with the times, and the importance of understanding your audience. This project helped me recognize these important lessons, and I wanted to share a few tips that I used which helped me reach these conclusions and learn these lessons.
Example:
Returning Missionary:
Windy,
Congrats on completing your missionary service! We’re excited to let you know that you’ve been readmitted to Brigham Young University-Idaho. You’ll be starting on the Fall/Winter Track in Winter 2024, with classes kicking off on Monday, January 8, 2024. We’re looking forward to having you on campus and believe you’ll be a great addition to the university.
Non-Matriculating Admit:
Dear Windy,
Congratulations! You’ve been admitted as a Non-Matriculating Student (Non-Degree Seeking) at BYU-Idaho for Fall 2024. Classes start on Monday, September 16, 2024.
Non matriculating students are usually older than the average college student returning from their mission and you can see that the tone and style of words used is tailored to the specific audience.
3 Tips for Effective Communication:
1. Conduct Research
Conduct thorough research to understand your needs and the audience. I analyzed data to determine which letters were unnecessary and which ones needed to be updated. Without understanding the data and research, I wouldn’t have been able to effectively determine which letters needed revision. Seeking feedback from students and full-time counselors was crucial to verify that the letters accurately conveyed the intended messages and provided clear, valuable information.
2. Provide Clarity
Ensure your messages are clear and precise. Avoid specific jargon and complex sentences. The revised letters were straightforward and easy to understand, improving their effectiveness.
3. Be Willing to Adapt
Engage your audience by addressing their specific needs and adapting your communication style to fit different contexts. Personalized and relevant content in the letters helped to more effectively address the needs of prospective and admitted students.
This project was more than just revising letters; it was an opportunity for me to apply the principles and skills I’ve learned as a student at BYU-Idaho. This experience will be invaluable as I move forward in my career.
Examples
I’ve attached a few of the original and updated letters below and a copy of the booklet I made. I’ve also included the spreadsheet I used to gather data and determine which letters needed to be updated.